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Whence my Pessimism?

5 September 2012

Short post today. Too much to do. I tried to be even-handed and honest in my predictions for both paper and grant. I predicted an improved but unfundable score on the grant, and a revise and resubmit on the paper. Well, the results are in. I got a slightly worse score than the first submission, and an outright reject on the paper. Deeply disappointing.

But I may have some good news too. I will be meeting with my hospital administration about increasing my role in quality assurance efforts, which I enjoy and which would hopefully relieve some of my funding issues. I have contacted a quality director at Prestigious Research Hospital about doing consulting work, and he responded favorably. Things will likely be ok in the long run. I still have lots of irons in fires.

My attorney is going to help me put together an admissibility opinion for Canada which argues that I am not inadmissible at all, because of the adjudication of my DUI. Essentially, I was told that completing all my legal requirements (which I did) would result in having the offense expunged from my record. In Canada, that’s called an “absolute discharge”, and would therefore render me eligible like anyone else. I have some papers to gather up, he’ll provide me with a package to present if I am challenged at the border, and that’ll be that. I’ll just go to Canada when I want and see what happens.

I am advancing on my R01eq. Today I have begun writing the background section, which must cover the widely disparate fields of diabetic retinopathy and computer simulation. I’ve only written about 300 words this morning, but they’re referenced, which represents a lot of the work of the background section of a grant. I’ve recruited several people, ophthalmologists, and epidemiologist, and a health services researcher. Gotten a couple of endorsements. I’m writing this grant my way, with my own ideas. I believe I have a strong case to make for funding.

After moping over the weekend, and being shocked into a bit of emotional disability yesterday by both pieces of news, I’ve recovered and feel like I’m moving on. I’ve revised and resubmitted the paper to another journal, down a bit on the totem. I’ve got nothing to do about the grant score until we get the summary statement. So, I have other work to do. Now’s the time to do it.

5 Comments leave one →
  1. Mona permalink
    5 September 2012 13:08

    Best of luck. Sounds like you have lots of options. And yay on the Canada news!

  2. 5 September 2012 13:08

    That’s awesome! So much rejection in one day sucks, but I’m happy to hear that you’re powering through!

  3. NatC permalink
    5 September 2012 13:13

    You are amazing. That. Is. All. #strengthandcourage

  4. 5 September 2012 18:56

    Good on you for bouncing back so quickly! I had a crappy afternoon after getting poor results in an experiment that affects my project in a big way. I finally got in the groove about an hour ago but it’s tough to stay focused when I’m feeling disappointed.

    Also glad to hear you can get into Canada when and if you want to!

  5. sydlaughs permalink
    8 September 2012 09:21

    Rejection would suck the wind out of me for a day or so and then I would get right back to work at improving and re-submitting.

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